Friday, August 13, 2010

Where Does This Fall on the Adorable->Pathetic Scale?

From time to time, people have remarked to us (or to me about us), that they find it strange how often devoted partner and I do separate things. Or how we don't call to check in on each other. Or how, except in very very specific cases, there is no resentment/jealousy/peevishness about the time we spend apart. But I still get a lot of, "what does devoted partner do/say/think when you do x?" I think that having independence makes us value our time together more, but it might not be for everyone. Still, the one thing we both rely on and look forward to is that last moment of the day when we're in bed together.

So, last night when I realized that, by virtue of dropping him off at the airport I would be sleeping alone, I was kind of sad. We really don't spend many nights apart - the last time was a year ago. And it was my first time sleeping alone in the house. The scary, poorly lit, no-one-can-hear-you-scream house. I locked the doors for the first time in a while.

Then, after watching Steel Magnolias (something I would probably not do if I was sharing the couch), I became listless. There was no one to bother. I went to Whole Foods to do some shopping for the weekend; I made an upside-down nectarine cake (much more like a tatin - it needs creme fraiche to cut the sweet); I poked around on the internet.

And then I changed into one of devoted partner's shirts, arranged blankets and pillows on the floor of the living room, and fell asleep watching tv. Now I can make up some bullshit about how we don't have a tv in the bedroom anymore and falling asleep to tv is a luxury I can only experience when I have the house to myself, but the truth is, I kind of didn't want to sleep in our bed alone.

I know. It sounds crazy. It sounds a little unbalanced. But our bed is where WE sleep. I don't know where I sleep anymore. I'll try to be a little more evolved come Sunday night; thank goodness Amy has given me a reprieve (and a spare bed) in the Berkshires for the weekend!


  1. I'll be in the same situation Sunday night: the family is staying on the Cape for another week but I have to return home to Perform Important Work. My bachelor week will be filled with activities: working late, shambling around the empty house, and sleeping in a bed devoid of devoted partner. My devoted partner, not yours.

  2. And you certainly had no shortage of bedmates over the weekend. You were lovely to cuddle with--Jim is soooo lucky! xx

  3. Jim, would you like some company? I'm not offering my devoted partner as a bedfellow (at least not without money changing hands), but we could offer human interaction...

    And Amy, our cuddling opportunities have been sorely lacking post-college - thank goodness we were afforded the opportunity to huddle together in the face of olfactory issues...